I find it difficult to conform to anything. When I look deep down, there is always something inside me that protests whatever it is that I have accepted as truth or right. Sometimes I wish I had normal thought patterns, that I didn't care about the things I analyze continuously. I guess on some small level, I envy the ignorant. Along with the pursuit of knowledge, comes the realization that life was easier when you didn't know anything. Unfortunately for me, my entire life has surrounded the search for knowledge. I don't really know what I am looking for....peace, satisfaction, contentment...all of which I doubt I will find if I continue on the route that I am following. The search for one's self is only half the battle. Once you know who you are, you have to figure out how you fit in to the environment that your choices have built for yourself. This is where I find myself...along with the struggle to once and for all make up my mind on what I believe. I am entering adulthood, I should have some type of handle on what I believe in. But new experiences force me to reevaluate everything I ever thought was real. Maybe life isn't about maintaining your beliefs, maybe it's about opening your mind to the possibility that what you once believed no longer fits into who you are anymore. I don't know...